Burner Slut

I have rapidly come to the conclusion that either God in his infinite wisdom has decide that I need to date a man that I have expressly forbidden myself to date or..... I am just a burner slut and should hang out in the back alleys of restaurants randomly picking up any stray Cook, Chef or Sioux’s that comes out the door.
 I don’t want to date a smoker from Saskatchewan that has 2 cats and is ten years my junior.
I want a stable man with a good job and no pet's preferably from a province that doesn’t feel the need to keep the entrance to all their gay bars in dark back alley’s just to "see" what happens.
 I want a man that looks at my life and says "hey there is a stable guy with good long term prospect's" not a guy who thinks that just cause he has smoldering green eyes, thick brown hair, strong hands (no doubt from all the cutting and prepping of food), a fruit basket with more than average size banana and an ass that won't quit.......................................

Where was I? Oh yeah. I don’t need to date a guy that spends his time cutting up calamari and then comes home smelling of fish. In his tight checked pants and splotchy whites with hat head from one of those baseball caps that the restaurants are favoring nowadays. With a light undertone of burnt gas and charbroil. Face glowing from a night in a hot kitchen running from the weeds and making it all work out. Calling “86 the fish we only have 3 plates left".
 I don’t need it. I lived it once already. Will I ever learn?
A smoker! How in the 9 rings of hell can I date a smoker? A cat lovin, Saskatoon smoker of all things.
 I think Bogie said “of all the on-line dating sites in all the world why did he have to walk into mine?"

I think this is a test. I might have to go out with him a few more time before I know for sure though, but it’s probably a test.